How To Embrace Life's Unexpected Endings
Oh, life, why can’t you just stick to the script? Like, hello? Is it too much to ask for a little more 'happily ever after' every now and then?
Despite my daughter’s heads-up to avoid the "One Day” show on Netflix, curiosity got the better of me, and yep, I watched it. And, boy, was I not ready for that ending! (It totally blindsided me and ripped my heart out. 😭) Honestly, after the ending, I was a mixed bag of sad and mad 😠 because Hollywood didn't give me the ending I expected.
Sure, sure, hooray for creative storytelling. But you know what I want even more? The fairy tale wrap-up where everything falls into place exactly how I wanted it to.
Let's face it: you, like me, want to watch a show and feel hopeful that one day, your life mirrors those feel-good Hollywood storylines.
Watching something turn out more like real life? Uh, you have enough of that; thank you very much!
You and I know life isn’t always scripted to our liking. Instead, it can get unpredictable, painful, and sometimes downright disappointing. Like me, you might even be a bit curious about the return policy on a day, week, or year that just didn’t go as planned. Right?
And yet, sometimes the most unexpected place happiness lives is on the other side of disappointment (not your to-do list.)
THANK GOODNESS there are some serious pros to not getting what you wanted, such as…
❥ Sometimes, not getting what you want is God’s way of saving your a#%.
Like, sure, it’s a bummer the restaurant was out of your favorite entree, but maybe that means you avoided the grade A food poisoning it brought other customers that day.
❥ Feeling your emotions is a sign of health, even when they’re not fun feelings.
You’re a super force of ability and strength. Want proof? Just look at the vast spectrum of emotions you feel and survive feelings every day, Mama! That’s a superpower! You’re AH-MAZING.
Most importantly...
❥ You get to choose what happens next.
DOOR #1
Push against the reality of what is (whether you’re steaming mad, or deeply sad) and stay trapped in “Blah, Ugh, Why me?!?!” energy.
DOOR #2
Embrace what is — whatever it is! Take a moment to close your eyes, breathe, and choose a new perspective. Like, perhaps there’s a bigger picture, a meaning behind the moment, a divine script looking out for your highest good that you’re just not privy to yet.
This brings you to the big one: acceptance. The energy of acceptance can be a head-scratcher. So, let’s demystify!
But first, a note from our sponsor*, the dictionary: though they often get mixed up, acceptance and approval are two different things.
Acceptance is acknowledging something as true, also known as the opposite of being in denial. Like, “I accept the restaurant has run out of chocolate cake.”
Whereas approval stamps your okay-ness onto a situation, like, “I approve of you not having chocolate cake.” (Which, of course, you absolutely do not approve of.)
When something happens that leaves you in tears, bitter with resentment, or just plain numb, not knowing why the suck is happening, yet somehow trusting it’s all okay and peace is around the corner — is a big ask.
But you do bigger things than that every day, Mama.
What if your husband forgetting your birthday again finally spurs you to get vulnerable and have your first real talk in a long time? What if the next time your loving kiddo recommends you stay away from a movie they know you won’t like, you listen, strengthening your relationship by showing them how much you value and trust their opinion?
What if, on the other side of this crappy moment, is something you really, really, REALLY want?
In that case, why stay stuck when you’ve got all you need to move forward?
Sure, you don’t get to write every part of your story because there’s a whole freaking world of other people’s (and animal’s, plant’s, and the cosmic sky’s, etc.) stories happening around you. Yet...
You always have the opportunity to wrap yourself up in the comforting blanket of faith — trusting there’s a reason for the season and good things ahead.
Lately, I’ve been bringing acceptance energy to the not-so-fun reality that my body is (eh-hem) changing. How? By choosing to do something about how I feel about it.
(See P.S. below for my current body acceptance ritual.)
You totally got this, Mama! Everything you need is already within you. Soulfull Medicine is here to help you discover it!
xo,
P.S. I’m working on connecting with my body in a new way midlife. (Because the old way involved a lot of harsh observations about aging that were really bumming me out. You know I wasn’t about to sit around stewing in those thoughts!) Check out a current ritual for embracing menopausal changes in this article – you might find it uplifting!
*Soulfull Insights is not actually sponsored by the dictionary. Though I would like to add ‘badass knockout goddess’ to the definition of midlife. So, maybe it’s in the cards?!
